I think this blank slate phase is also me finally having to work for something. Not have it given like Joseph's favor, placed upon him by God and received by others in God's own timing. NO. This is me learning how to take ownership of my life. To ask myself the hard questions, to dive... Continue Reading →
Juliet
I'm hurt + disappointed. Our words fly, then goodbyes. Our goodbyes lead to good riddances. Was I really that much of a nuisance? Are we really just different sides of the same child? I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm sorry she, me, we weren't enough. Was it really that tough--that you had to up... Continue Reading →
Shatter
You know it when you feel it: those moments that just leave you standing with your whole being shattered. With that hollowness of realization yet explosion of emotions warring against your bones. They leave you with your heart hanging out of your chest, and you have to quickly pick it up and carry it around... Continue Reading →
Yet Again, At Odds
We are living history. Yet again-- yet again as Russia plunges us into Soviet tensions turning back the pages rewinding the tape like we haven't come a long way since like we haven't created new technological developments like social media and the colored TV World War II did not know. At odds-- at odds are... Continue Reading →
Loyal Love
. . . is the love of a dog. A dog who knows that whenever you are asleep on the couch in the early morning hours after getting up to take him out--which always seems to be 20 minutes before your alarm is set to go off--to play on his own for a while, or... Continue Reading →
Rewind: . . . Play
Can someone press rewind on the remote of her life-- watch the blue static-grained screen with the word "Rewind" in the corner like she did when she spent hours watching VHS Disney movies-- and tell her that she doesn't need to look forward to the day when she has her "adult life?" When she's on... Continue Reading →
<3
I was the one who gave him everything. Love. Comfort. Help. Encouragement. Arms--a home for both his body and heart. I gave him everything . . . including the knife he twisted around, used to stab. hurt. morph me into Julius's corpse. I gave him everything, and I was the one who paid. Paid with... Continue Reading →
One Traveler
Six hours got me from Texas to Arkansas-- six hours of just me and the open road, indie music blaring, breezes blasting through the open sunroof. Six hours of driving seems like a lot, but really I was just there. Existing. … Existing. Almost six months between moving back home and now, six months of... Continue Reading →
Lava
"If there's something you want to say, say it." Nonchalant, yet sharp were those words he spoke plainly. And they hit somewhere deep in my gut, a cater of lava that was swirling, pooling, waiting like a prisoner, ready to bound forth from its cage and into tumbling words spilling out of my mouth with... Continue Reading →
Feeling Good(?)
Birds flying high-- stars when you shine-- dragonfly out in the sun-- fish in the sea-- you once knew how I feel . . . . . . feeling good. But now, I am no Nina Simone, and I find that I am feeling . . . . . . well, I am not feeling... Continue Reading →
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