You know it when you feel it: those moments that just leave you standing with your whole being shattered. With that hollowness of realization yet explosion of emotions warring against your bones. They leave you with your heart hanging out of your chest, and you have to quickly pick it up and carry it around... Continue Reading →
Loyal Love
. . . is the love of a dog. A dog who knows that whenever you are asleep on the couch in the early morning hours after getting up to take him out--which always seems to be 20 minutes before your alarm is set to go off--to play on his own for a while, or... Continue Reading →
Rewind: . . . Play
Can someone press rewind on the remote of her life-- watch the blue static-grained screen with the word "Rewind" in the corner like she did when she spent hours watching VHS Disney movies-- and tell her that she doesn't need to look forward to the day when she has her "adult life?" When she's on... Continue Reading →
Lived
The past couple of months have taught me that life is short. You never know when today is your last day, never know when the next 6 months are your last, never know when on this day next year, it'll be your last, never know if it's your last Thanksgiving . . . Christmas .... Continue Reading →
What is Not Lost
An old friend told me the other day that her family is selling the house she grew up in, the house I have visited more times over the years than I can count. The house where we had a plethora of sleepovers that resulted in giggles, movie marathons, walks in the woods, deep and serious... Continue Reading →
Creation
"You're mourning the loss of what you thought your life was going to be. Let it go. Things don't always work out how you plan. That's not necessarily bad. Things have a way of working out anyway."Frasier Crane I was the kid with the planner. I still am. If you knew me in high school,... Continue Reading →
Atlas
Darkness stood still over our house, the sun at the brink of rising, whenever I gathered up my stuff and headed out the door to work. But as I passed my mother's room, knowing that I had an important day at work today, she said with such simplicity: "Don't carry the world on your shoulders."... Continue Reading →
Mist
It's been forever since I've heard the sound of coyotes. Long, pierced howls--a cacophony of deep-throated cries and squeaked screams. They sound closer than I remember as I walk outside into the cold night, the little puppy I'm babysitting in tow behind me sniffing out his next spot to mark as his territory. Around us... Continue Reading →
Embers
On the news this morning, they showcased an exhibit on the importance of the materials that make up a house and on the type of and distance of landscaping that surrounds a house regarding the natural disaster wildfires that shoot embers at man-built structures up to 130 miles per hour. With the right materials and... Continue Reading →
???
My life consists of question marks. It is one big puzzle, and they build the outer edges, fill up in the inner space with their rounded curves and soul-piercing dots. I once always knew what step I was taking next. Had everything planned out, my i's dotted and t's crossed. There were no question marks,... Continue Reading →
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